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Last night I had a dream that I ran away. I ran away from everything in my life, even my wonderful husband and went to Thailand, of all places. I guess I've been wanting to go there so that is where my dreams took me. I didn't tell anyone that I was leaving or where I was going. When I got to my destination there was a huge party going on and all my old friends were there. Old friends that I haven't seen or thought of in years. We were all trying to laugh and catch up on eachother's lives but our eyes were filled with the sweetest sadness. I got the feeling that we had all run away from something and through all the giggles was a giant gaping hole in our souls.
Later in the night group of dancers came on and performed and rather than enjoy it I got angry. I thought that the dancers weren't good enough and wondered why my dance group didn't know about this place and why couldn't we perform there. Then another lost friend called from across the room and I forgot about it.
After what seemed like a short stay I returned back to my real life and called my boss. She asked why I had been gone for 3 weeks and where had I been. It didn't feel like I had been gone for that long but then again I guess you don't keep track of time when you're trying to escape your life. I didn't tell her the answers she wanted but it seemed like she didn't really care what I had to say anyways. All the other people in my life didn't really say anthing about my disappearance. It was almost as though they weren't worried about me or they expected me to do something like that anyways. It felt strange to me because I'm always so responsible and careful in real life. Maybe that's why I had this dream to urge my desire to be carefree and throw caution to the wind. Such a thing seems impossible after life saddles you down though.
And then I woke up.